My Marathon

April and I have discussed what’s next after paying off the mortgage, the vision for 5 years from now. She even scheduled a dream meeting for us to tempt me to loosen up and throw ideas out. And even in the comfort of my living room with only my wife, the task was impossible.

Somehow, a scarcity mindset is the default setting controlled by my amygdala. A byproduct of fear. And with outside influence, the world is ripe with fuel: 40 year high inflation, supply chain chaos, recession fears, Ukrainian war against Russia, Covid-19 uncertainty and the list goes on depending on where you live and your own personal situation. My personal defense for this biological response is rational and reason. I studied economics in college, and so constructing my understanding of my external environment also helps.

On a macro level, in early 2020 we curbed all demand with our global lockdowns. We then globally dumped insane amounts of stimulus into the global economy, which then created a tsunami of consumer demand for everything. So as a business with record demand and no supply, what do you do? Increase demand. Globally you had additional strain on the supply chains, hiring and pricing. Therefore, now we have record unemployment from this demand, maxed out supply chains that still aren’t fully functioning and screaming hot prices. What’s next, how do we fix it? My response as the unqualified critic in the room isn’t political in nature, but reason based. We have burned through the stimulus dollars and the Fed is now easing out of their position of propping up the system. So, we need to come back to a more sustainable level of consumer demand. Some normalcy. To get there requires some pain. Demand slows down, which will offset rising prices with higher unemployment, this will also allow our supply chains to catch up. This also puts the brakes on the overheated economy, and the unknown is how hard the braking will be and how does that recession look like.

And even with all that flashing through my brain, I fear the unknown. It’s not that I feel like I’m a victim of the system, it’s more that I fear that storm that will destroy everything. The understanding of the global economy is easier than pinpointing where I fit in. To the extreme of completely missing out on enjoying where we are in life. A long-distance marathon with no end in sight. So for me to envision our future, I need help first by getting out of the race and resetting. Like the economy, my brain is overheated from the chase. If I save every dollar now, I risk never having the opportunity to enjoy the experiences they will create someday. You can’t take it with you when you are gone.

So, my wants include: shifting away from putting my current work first, focusing on my personal passions, enjoying now, expanding my social circle and changing my mindset towards abundance. My abundance is a wife who supports me, loves me unconditionally, an incredible mother, and she is absolutely stunning. My abundance is two healthy, happy children. Getting to see them learn and explore the world and being their guide to life. My abundance is contentment with things and focusing on my time. And through understanding what I want and where I want to be. April and I can focus on our why and our vision for our future. As a couple, a family, and individuals.